The Men of Iron Minute

by Chad Zueck | Director of Content Creation

9 Things to Hard Wire Into Your Marriage

The stage was set. My girlfriend and I were going to the Illinois State Fair. We were in that “couldn’t wait to see each other phase,” and we spent nearly every waking moment hand and hand—sappy but true. I was fit and fresh out of boot camp with a jacked-up haircut—courtesy of the United States Navy. I had creatively gotten her ring size from her family, and now all I had to do was pop the question. I decided I would propose to her on top of the Ferris Wheel at the State Fair. Before you think that was my idea, I high jacked that idea from a chick flick I had seen (shhh, she might not know that). It went just as planned, and of course, she said yes. We got married in a couple of months. It was awesome! She took my breath away and still does. That was a long time ago.

Like a really long time ago. 1993 a-g-o! It took me a minute, but I learned something. It is easy to get married, but boy, is it hard to stay married. She’s changed. I have changed. We had kids. We wanted to send them to live in Bolivia until their teenage years were over, but apparently, that is frowned upon. But if that was an option, I might have taken it. My wife and I hard wired a resolve never to divorce. Those were words, and at times, our selfishness defied our decisions. We love one another. Love has never been the question, though. Do we always like each other? That’s the question.


If you want to like her as much as you love her, hard wire these nine things into your marriage:

  1. Surround yourself with other happily married men
  2. Stay connected no matter what
  3. Choose your battles
  4. Go to God with your insecurities
  5. Don’t assume she knows what you know or feels what you feel
  6. Honor her in public
  7. Listen to her in private
  8. Be kind even in your disagreements
  9. Give God the keys to your marriage


Bonus Take: Take her to the state fair, and if you see a dude with a jacked-up haircut who is so nervous he is sweating through his shirt, pray for him. He’s in over his head, and he doesn’t have a clue.


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